(This post is going to be a combination of several things... but please bear with me)
But behold, I, Jacob, would speak unto you that are pure in heart. Look unto God with firmness of mind, and pray unto him with exceeding faith, and he will console you in your afflictions, and he will plead your cause, and send down justice upon those who seek your destruction.
My parents came into town last night and after we went to dinner. My dad went back to their hotel and I was able to spend some time with my mom. She did the typical mom thing and took me to the store to get groceries and some Christmas decorations for my pathetically decorated tree. She then took me up and dropped me off on campus so I could work on homework until the buildings closed. We got to talking on the way up about trials people have gone through in their lives. I have to tell you now, my mom has seen me through a lot over the years. I've dealt with a lot of conflict in my life and have been hurt by a lot of people I thought I could trust. My mom has seen me through it all. She's cried with me. She's let me yell when frustrated. But we both came to a realization last night. We are grateful for our trials. And because we have stuck with the Lord and trusted in him, we have become better people and have learned how to handle conflict better.
My mom reminded me last night that I am in a really good place in my life right now. And it's completely true I realized. Usually during each semester I am in conflict with one roommate or the other. I'm usually angry and frustrated and really wound up about life in general. But I've learned, it doesn't hurt anything for me to just stay out of it. I feel like I'm a well liked person and I have a lot of friends. And that makes me feel great about myself! I've learned to cool it and not get so wound up about school. Last Winter was the worst.... you could ask anyone. But this semester I am just as busy, or even more, and I am having a great time. I've taken a chill pill so to speak.
This class has been such a help in making me realize what kind of person I am and what my needs are in order to be happy. My first color is red, and my secondary is white. And I think I'm beginning to find a good balance between the two. I have no problem confronting people about problems. I'm confident when I speak can keep a clear head. But at the same time, I really hate conflict. In my experience. NO GOOD COMES FROM IT!!!! Trust me on that. That's where my white comes into play. I really do treasure a peaceful life. While I can stand up for myself and argue a point, I'd rather not because I know it really won't do anyone any good.
So let me revert back to the scripture... "But behold, I, Jacob, would speak unto you that are pure in heart. Look unto God with firmness of mind, and pray unto him with exceeding faith, and he will console you in your afflictions, and he will plead your cause, and send down justice upon those who seek your destruction."
If I had to pick one important lesson that I've learned in my life so far, it would be this. Throughout everything I've been through in the last four years, I've put my trust in him, and my mom for that matter, and have kept with the church. Now, I'm not saying I've been perfect throughout everything. I have soooooo not been. I've made so many mistakes, but what's important is that I've learned from them. But as I look back over this last year especially, I've been so blessed in my life. And I know with out a doubt that's because of how I reacted to the trials in my life. I am grateful for my trials.
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