Marissa's Notebook: 5 positives vs. 5 negatives

Monday, September 20, 2010

5 positives vs. 5 negatives

Today in class, we were discussing self perception and how we feel others perceive us. Someone mentioned that their mom used to make them say 5 nice things about someone when they were being mean to them. That made a memory click...

This last summer I worked for an insurance company that did workshops for schools. I had the opportunity to go observe one where the subject was bullying. I remember them saying that it takes 5 similar negative comments to make someone believe they are something they're really not.

The Comment: "You're Stupid"

1st response: "I'm not stupid you're stupid!"

2nd response: "I don't think I'm stupid..."

3rd response: "Am I stupid?"

4th response: "Maybe I am stupid."

5th response: "He's right, I am stupid"

And these kinds of comments stick with us for the rest of our lives. It's sad - but it does. It just goes to show how careful we need to be in our words to others. Be aware of what you are saying. Speak words of kindness and you will have a great impact on someone's life.

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Two Persons - The Good

For this assignment I'm supposed to pick a person of whom I have a good relationship with and record how I have worked to improve this relationship throughout the course of the semester. I've decided I'd like to improve my relationship with my friend Breanne.

Me and Breanne met under some unusual circumstances last fall, and have been best friend ever since. Our housing complex last fall oversold on private room contracts and three of us girls that had private rooms were placed in one apartment. (Please note that there are only two private rooms per apartment.) Lets make a long story short, if our manager hadn't made this mistake, Breanne would have been in a different apartment (because I was signed up to live with a friend who had the other private room) and we would have never gotten to know each other. I believe me and Breanne were destined to be friends. :) We have so much fun together and get get along like peas and carrots.

Specific Goals: To have better communication, listen better, be more empathetic

Two Persons - The Not-So-Good

For this assignment I'm supposed to pick a person of whom I have a not-so-good relationship with and work on improving it throughout the course of the semester. I feel one person in particular that I would like to have a better relationship with is my sister Holly.

Holly and I fought nonstop growing up. I know it's because I took the place as the baby in the family. You see, Holly was the baby for 7 years before I came along. It's gotten better over the years, but I think it's better today because we both tend to "stay out of each others way". Not in avoidance, but because we don't want to start something. We have fun and play when we get together, but there's still some kind of wall in between us.

I'd really like to improve this relationship, as I would with all my siblings, but especially Holly. She has such a sweet, giving heart and I would like to be closer to her so I can learn more from her. Our relationship is difficult yes, but I'd like to become best friends with my sister.

Monday, September 20, 2010

5 positives vs. 5 negatives

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