Keep a three-day record of your feelings (this can be in your Portfolio). You can do this by spending a few minutes each evening recalling what emotions you felt during the day, what other people were involved, and the circumstances in which the emotions occurred.
Feeling Diary:
Day One: Feeling pretty good today. It's been rainy so that kind of puts a damper on things. I was able to go to my first meeting for the New York trip today. I'm feeling overwhelmed with school today and I'm frustrated with my roommates. I'd like to blame them but I don't think I can.
Day Two: Feeling better today! I got to see my parents and plus it's Friday! I was able to talk to my sister today and then me and my parent's went to The Social Network. It was a very well done and inspiring movie.
Day Three: Today has been a mildly good day. I woke up this morning and went to the sand dunes to take pictures for my class. I've been working on homework all day and watching tv. Hopefully something more exciting will happen later.
At the end of the three-day period you can understand the role that emotions play in your communication by answering the following questions.
1. How did you recognize the emotions you felt: through physicological stimuli, nonverbal behaviors or cognitive processes?
I think my process is mostly cognitive. I have a lot of stomach flipping whenever I'm upset or really excited. A lot of my internal physical reactions are the same for both situations.
2. What emotions do you have most often? Are they primary or mixed? Mild or intense? Are any of them "debilitative" emotions? Are they based on irrational thinking?
They are mostly mild. I am happy a lot but I don't get really excited. And when I am sad it's usually mildly, but then there are the cases when I am really upset - which results in stomach aches and headaches. I think some of my emotions could be debilitative - usually when I get really upset I just need to sleep it off or do something else to forget about it for a while - like talking to a friend. But I can't do homework usually when I'm upset. Some of them could be based on irrational thinking. I know I overreact sometimes and blow things out of proportion, but I'm getting better.
3. In what circumstances do you or don't you show your feelings? What factors influence your decision to show or not show your feelings? The situation, people, and subject involved? Do you repeatedly use any of the "fallacies" described in the book?
I tend not to want to show emotion at all. When I'm around people I don't trust or don't know, I won't show emotion. But when it's with people I really trust, there are only a select few (don't take it personal) I will tell how I'm feeling and express my frustrations. I think this is mostly with when I am angry about something. Otherwise when I'm excited I'll share it with more people, but again not with everyone. I think the fallacy I use the most is the Fallacy of Perfection. I don't like to show weakness myself and I like to know how to do things right - as should everyone else. I have really high expectations for myself, some of which I know are probably too high, but that's how I get things done. I push myself to the limit and sometimes over the edge.
4. What are the consequences of the type of communicating you described? Are you satisfied with these consequences? If not, what can you do to become more satisfied?
I think people think I am a snob sometimes. I don't talk a lot, I don't express emotion openly, I don't trust easily, and I work hard to get really good grades - those are the facts. I can be open and friendly, but I choose to be quiet. (Wow, I sound like a terrible person) I sit in my room for hours studying and working on projects - as a result I'm really not close to any of my roommates. I think if I simplified my life a little bit (I don't know how...) I would have more friends and do more fun things. I would probably be happier in a social aspect but not satisfied academically. It's a tricky situation.
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